Mix Jokes

Do you know of a Sardar who parked his car in
front of board which said FINE FOR PARKING
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A drunk was hauled into court.
Mister, the judge began, you've been brought
here for drinking..

Great, the drunk exclaimed. When do we get started?
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Can you do anything that other people can't?
Sure, I can read my handwriting..
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When a wife was asked: What book do you like the best?
She answers: My husband's cheque book..
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Girlfriend: And are you sure you love me and no one else?
Boyfriend: Dead Sure! I checked the whole list again yesterday.
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My father is so old that when he was in school, history
was called current affairs.
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Teacher: Now, children, if I saw a man beating a donkey
and stopped him, what virtue would I be Showing?
Student: Brotherly love.
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Teacher: Now, Sam, tell me frankly do you say prayers before eating?
Sam : No sir, I don't have to, my mom is a good cook.
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Manager: Sorry, but I can't give u a job. I don't need much help. Job
Applicant: That's all right. In fact I'm just the right person in
this case. You see, I won't be of much help anyway!!
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Dad: Son, what do u want for ur birthday?
Son: Not much dad, Just a radio with a sports car around it.
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Teacher: Desmond, your composition on "My Dog" is exactly the same as
your brother's. Did u copy his?
Desmond: No, teacher, it's the same dog!
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Diner: I can't eat such a rotten chicken. Call the manager!
Waiter: It's no use. He won't eat it either.
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Diner: You'll drive me to my grave!
Waiter: Well, you don't expect to walk there, do you?
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Husband: U know, wife, our son got his brain from me.
Wife: I think he did, I've still got mine with me!
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Man: Officer! There's a bomb in my garden!
Officer: Don't worry. If no one claims it within three days
, you can keep it.
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Father: Your teacher says she finds it impossible to
teach you anything!

Son: That's why I say she's no good!
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Should women have children after 35
No, 35 children are more than enough!
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No one has ever complained of a parachute not
opening..
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Living on Earth may be expensive, but it
includes an annual free trip around the Sun..
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Children in backseats cause accidents
Accidents in backseats cause children !

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funny questions & answers
Question : You are in a boat in the middle of a river. You have 2
Cigarettes and have to light any one cigarette. You don't have anything
else with you in the boat? How will you do it?


Answer: Take one cigarette and throw it in the water. So the boat will
become LIGHTER........using this LIGHTER you can light the other
Cigarette
another deadly answer. Scroll down a little
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Anoth! er solution: You throw a cigarette up and catch it. Catches win
Matches. Using the matches that you win, you can light the cigarette
If that was not enough, one more deadly answer.... scroll down.
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Take water in your hand and drop it drop by drop...(TIP - TIP)

"TIP TIP barsa Pani.

Pani ne aag lagayee."

us aag se hamne cigarette jalayee".
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If that was not enough, one more deadly answer.... scroll down



Start praising one cigarette, The other will get jealous & "jalney
lagega"

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SOME FUNNY CONVERSIONS.......
RAM SITA HAI ... TO RAM KAUN HAI ??
Ans - . TAILOR ( darzi )

Q2. SITA RAM HAI TO SITA KAUN HAI
Ans - . Sita MEMORY hai (RAM: Random Access Memory)

Q3. Prasad ask's Kumble to bring a pepsi... Kumble brings a bottle of pepsi
but goes directly to Tendulkar.? why ?? why ?? :-)
Ans:- Tendulkar is an opener

Q5. Woh kya hai jo Dil main hain, Mann main hai par Dhadkan main nahi?
Ans:- aarey Aamir Khan !!!!!!!

Q6. What will! u call a person who is leaving India ??
Socho...............
Ans:- Hindustan Lever (Leaver).

Q7. Kalidas ka ek bhai joote banata tha us ka naam kya tha?
Ans:- adidas

Q8. Luv and Kush are going to a village & in between comes a well. Luv falls
into the well. Why ?
Ans:- Because Luv is blind!!!!!

Now Kush also jumps inside. Why? OK lot's of head scratching done.
Ans:- Luv ke liye saala kuch bhi karega!!!!

Want one more...

Q9. Jackie Chan ki saas ka naam kya hai?.. nahi pata..??
Ans:- D'Cold chain ki saans !!!!!!

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